Dildos: An Introduction

Earlier, we covered the basics of vibrators. Today, let’s talk about politicians–oops, I meant, dildos!

 

History

The dildo is ancient. Ever since there have been people, there have been people who have wanted to shove things in their orifices. We here at SpicyGear take pride in knowing that we are simply plying the same trade as our ancestors– our ancient, ancient ancestors.

Proving that Germany has always been kinky, the earliest known, official dildo was found near Ulm and is dated to over 30,000 years ago. But phallic items have been found to be even older than that, although their purposes are unknown. And it’s not some big secret, either. They appear all over the place in famous works of art, from Shakespeare’s A Winter’s Tale to ancient Grecian vases.

Throughout the centuries, dildos have been made from a wide variety of items– everything from the more common materials today, like metal, wood, and glass, to the absurd, like bone, bread, vegetables, and rocks. Basically, if you can make it look phallic, chances are, someone has shoved it inside of their body. And if you can’t make it look phallic, they probably have anyway.

 

How-To

Pictured: Not actually a dildo.

If you found vibrators easy to use, the dildo is even easier. Once again, there’s no wrong way to use it, so long as you’re safe and hygienic. You can read more about how to keep your toys clean here.

Some have suction cups or bases so you can set them on something and ride them in a crouching position, or stick them to the wall or shower (don’t slip!) But most you can use in your favorite position, in the hole of your choosing, and at whatever pace feels best. A good starting tip is to make sure you begin with something small, if you don’t know how much you can take. Take a lot of time feeling your toy and getting to know it before putting it into your sensitive areas, so you know how it’s going to feel and can make sure it won’t be uncomfortable.

But before that, make sure you apply lots of lube. You can find out which lube is best for your dildo by checking out our handy-dandy lube guide. If this is your first time using a dildo and you don’t know your own personal depth or tightness, you may want to start with something small and work your way up (as enticing as all 12 inches of our John Holmes Realistic Dildo is).

If you’re hankering for those good, good, good, good vibrations but love your dildo, there’s a fairly simple solution. A simple cock ring, like our world-famous Vibrating Johnnies, can slip over a dildo, like they would any other penis, and place the vibrating part on wherever would suit you best.

Types

Unlike the vibrator, most dildos are pretty straight forward (even if they aren’t straight at all). There’s only so many gadgets and crap you can strap on one.

Realistic: The end-all, be-all of dildos. These guys look like penises. Real, live penises. Whereas many vibrators can get into some pretty fantastical shapes and designs, until recently, the most variation in dildo style has been black or white– as in, do you want a caucasian or a black penis? So if you want the penis without the dude attached to it, these are a great option. Our customer’s favorite is the Adam Dexter Realistic Dildo for its curved shaft and gorgeous coloration.

Strap-On: Strap-ons are a great tool for someone who requires a tool, but doesn’t have one. Sometimes, they are sold simply as a harness for you to put your favorite dildo in and other times, a harness with a dildo  pre-attached. When using a strap-on for the first time, make sure you have plenty of time to get used to it. When using it on a partner, make sure that they, too, have had time to get used to the length and girth (and even texture) of your new wang, just like they would any other dildo. Lots of lube is always a good starting place, but if you’re using the strap with other partners and you’re not sure what material it’s made of, make sure to wear a condom.

Anal: Anal dildos and butt plugs run a wide range of size spectrums.  For example, the Double Fantasy is fairly skinny, and is great for beginners. Our Black Rubber Anal Plugs run the whole spectrum of sizes, so if you’re unsure about what plug is best for your bum, checking out that set may be a great idea.

Glass: Honestly, I can’t rant and rave enough about glass dildos. Not only do they look beautiful and feel amazing, but they’re great for temperature play. You can read about me gushing (not like that) over them in The Magical World of Glass Dildos. Don Wands’ Glass Gem Aquamarine is a big favorite and one of our most popular orders.

Double-Ended: A favorite in the lesbian porn arena, doubles can also be used for double-penetration by a single female-bodied person, or any other assortment of ways. A cool alternative to sharing a double with a partner is the Feeldoe, which one partner can apply pressure to the other side of the dildo using a sort of pump. If you prefer smaller and your partner likes ’em big, our Art Deco AC/DC Double Dong is the perfect option for you.

Packer: Packers aren’t typically used for sex, but they are still often sold alongside other dildos in many stores. Packers are tools used by trans* people who are born without penises to feel more at home in their skin, although you don’t have to be trans* to enjoy them– whether you’re experimenting with your gender identity, roleplaying with your partner, or even just like the feel, they’re a great addition to any collection. Most aren’t use for sex because the material can be damaged, but some can have a straight, metal rod placed in them. Using a packer that is erect is called hard packing, whereas having a flaccid packer is, of course, soft packing. We don’t currently sell packers, but other stores, like Babeland, have tons of options available.